


The Thief and the Moon

by catpop12343



Series: The Thief and The Moon (And Other Related Stories) [1]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alchemy, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Because I can, Canon-Typical Violence, Devil's Nest, Gen, Here we go, How Do I Tag, I Don't Even Know, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, POV First Person, Sparring, Theft, Why Did I Write This?, but guess what, eventual angst, i don't care, i just realized that Tanner's age doesn't match the time line, oh boy, or attempted theft, pessimism
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:08:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26067007
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catpop12343/pseuds/catpop12343
Summary: Jean Louise Tanner has lived on the streets for the past ten years of his life. He only managed to survive through stealing. One day, he selects a new target, but little did he know that he was about to make the decision that would change his life forever.
Series: The Thief and The Moon (And Other Related Stories) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1892323
Kudos: 1





	1. Nobody Steals From Me!

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically just some self-indulgent bullshit I'm writing. The title comes from a song of the same name written by Shawn James. IDK how it's related it's just a song about a thief.

I  _ thought _ that this would be easy. He looked like the kind of guy who was too full of himself to notice if anything of his was missing. Just steal the money and get out. Easy.

Footfalls barely making a sound as I run down the street, I trail him to a bar in the shadier side of town. Perfect. Just as predicted. I wait by the entrance of  _ The Devil’s Nest _ for about five minutes, before dashing away into a back alley; one that I knew well. I follow the narrow street until I reach a main road. Then, I follow the flow of traffic until I reach a crosswalk. I fast walk to the opposite side of the street and duck behind a nearby building, then turn into another alley. A few more zig-zagging turns, and I arrive at a spot where a sewage pipe sticks out of a wall.

The sewers were always my favorite hiding place, despite the fact that it smells like shit all the time. I take a deep breath, and cover my face with my scarf, and crawl into the pipe.

As I crawl deeper into the sewage, I go over my plan of action in my head for the fifth time that day.  _ The sewers connect every building in this city, directly or indirectly. The Devil’s Nest is no exception. I can sneak in through the underground passage and grab a pile of gold. Then, I’ll eat like a king. _

Soon, I reach a space big enough that I can stand up. I sigh with relief, and stretch out my cramped limbs. Okay, let’s do this. The long, imposing tunnel has a few smaller ones branching off of it, one of which connects to  _ The Devil’s Nest _ . It’s small, but still plenty big enough for me to stand up in.

The maze of tunnels are difficult to navigate, but if I remember correctly, I just need to keep right with a left turn every three, five, and seven turns.

When I hear distant, distorted laughter, I know I’m close. Turn right; the noise becomes more distinct. Turn right; individual voices can be heard, now. Turn left; Bingo! Light filters around the corner, and ever cautious, I approach.

There he is. The shark-toothed bastard and his gang; laughing and chatting away without a care in the world. And sitting right next to me, a huge pile of money. Completely unguarded. With a giddy smile, I shovel handfuls of it into my bag.

Then I accidentally drop a bunch of coins on the ground.  _ Fucking shit sticks! _

Shark Face turns, and yells, “What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” and I bolt.

I sprint down the twisting tunnels, allowing muscle memory to carry me out. I hear running behind me. Not good.

I pick up the pace, not even bothering to be silent anymore. Just when I thought I’d lost them, the man appeared as if out of nowhere from an intersecting path. “Nobody steals from me you little shit!”

And for some fucking reason, I couldn’t resist the urge to be a smartass. “Looks like I just did!” I barely managed to get the words out of my mouth before being  _ fucking clotheslined _ by a much taller, brawnier man.

“Shitting fuck! That hurt!” I exclaim, as more thugs gather around me. 

Their leader stares at me with so much anger his eyes seems to be glowing in the dark.

“What should we do with him, boss?” one of them said.

“Let’s see what you have to say for yourself  _ kid! _ ”

“How about fuck you?” Goddamnit! Why am I so stupid?!

A sword finds its place against my throat, pressed lightly against my jugular. And my soul seems to leave my body. “I- um, I mean.”

The gang leader sighs, clearly exasperated. This is it. This is how I die. Bleeding to death in the dark. How fitting. “Ugh, you know what, you’re fucking stupid. But you have potential. If you join my crew, I’ll let you live. Just don’t steal from me again, or I’ll kill you myself. Do we have a deal?” 

It takes me a second to register his extended hand.  _ Are those claws? _ “Um, hell yes. Sure beats dying.” I shake his hand, and something about it feels so final.

The man laughs heartily. “You made the right choice, kid. I’ll introduce you when we get back. But first… Hand over. My shit.”

Without hesitation, I toss him the bag. “Can I stand up now or is Mr. Swordsman over here going to slit my throat?”

The gang leader laughs again. “You’re funny, kid. I think I might like you already.”

Being in the generally clean basement of the sleazy bar is an upgrade from the sewers, by a long shot. I take a seat on a burgundy loveseat, with one of my legs dangling over the armrest, and the other folded up under me.

The first thing the gang leader does is shove a plate of meat pies ang grilled vegetables into my lap, and go around introducing his guys. “The name’s Greed, and these are Martel, Dolcetto, Ulchi, Roa, and Bido. And you are?”

“A thief?”

“No, I mean your name.”

I nearly choke on a piece of leek. “Oh yeah. I knew that. Just call me Tanner.”

“Tanner. How old are you?” Greed asks.

“Sixteen.”

“Do you have a family? Friends?”

“Nope. I haven’t had a friend in years. And my parents…” I pause, and take a deep breath. The wounds are still fresh. “My parents were both State Alchemists. They taught me everything I know. But then… they were killed during the Ishvalan Civil War.”

The room falls silent. I shift in my seat so I’m sitting properly. “I’ve lived on the streets ever since.”

Finally, Greed speaks. “Oof, that sounds rough, kid. Sorry for your loss.”

“Eh, it’s alright. I have alchemy. When I perform alchemy, I feel like I’m close to them again.”

From there, the mood shifted to something much more lighthearted. Folks eat and chat, and I sit and fidget with the threads on my poncho. It feels nice to be a part of something. Here’s hoping I can make it last.


	2. Sparring Match: Greed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanner spars with Greed. That's literally it.

Apparently meals are consistent around here. Greed wasn’t even embarrassed to admit that he likes to cook. And boy, is he good at it. I’ll never get tired of eating food as good as this.

A short, happy-looking man with a sword sits next to me, smiling as he shovels bacon and eggs into his mouth.  _ Dolcetto. That’s his name, right? _ Despite the anxiety gnawing at my insides, I try to strike up a conversation. “Swords, huh?”

The man swallows a mouthful of food before speaking. “Yup! I’m pretty good with one, if I do say so myself.”

“Cool. I have a knife,” I reply, showing off the sheathed weapon.

“Nice. Can I see it?”

“Sure. Just… give it back when you’re done.”

Dolcetto unsheathes the small blade, and examines it. The weapon has a narrow iron crossguard and a leaf-shaped blade. “Not bad, kid. This is a good knife. Where’d you get it?”

“I stole it from a weaponsmith a couple years back,” I explain proudly.

“Awesome.”

“Yeah.”

After breakfast, Greed stands up and addresses the room. “Alright, boys! How about a bit of sparring practice for our newest member, yeah?”

Murmurs of agreement fill the room, and Dolcetto hands me my knife.

“Okay. Who do I get to fight first?”

“I figured that’d be your choice,” the man replies with a smirk.

“Then I’ll have to go with  _ you _ . Just gotta make sure you’re really what you’re cracked up to be.”

Greed’s smirk broadens into a grin. “Then let’s get started.”

Immediately, his hands and forearms turn dark grey, and his fingers become claw-like.

“So I wasn’t hallucinating in the sewers yesterday, you  _ do _ have claws,” I say, brandishing my knife.

“Yup. It’s my Ultimate Shield. I can make my skin—” I interrupt his statement with an elbow strike to his chest.

I shoot him a grin as he staggers backwards a bit. “Gotta pay attention, Boss. Can’t expect to win a fight if you—” 

The man lunges towards me, claws swiping at my face. Thankfully, I manage to duck just in time, and the blow only just grazes my hairline. I smirk at his speedy recovery and counterattack. The others in the room cheer.  _ Touché _ .

I recover quickly, and before my opponent can retract his hand, I punch him in the stomach and take a half-step backwards, before hitting him in the face with the pommel of my knife.

Greed struggles to keep his balance for a bit, but doesn’t quite fall over. When he looks at me, I can see that his eyes are watering, and his nose bleeding. He growls, and wipes the blood away from his face with the back of his hand, and stares at it. 

While he’s still stunned, I grapple my opponent by the arms and knee him in the stomach. Then, Greed practically tosses me to the ground, knocking the air out of me. I roll away a few feet, and stand up.

“Not bad, kid. Not bad at all.” Greed smiles, then runs towards me, and manages to get in a solid hit to my chest. Not hard enough to do any real damage, mind you, but it did knock me over.

“Fuck, that hurt!” I complain. Then, as he’s raising his hand to strike again, I see an opening. Without hesitation, I throw my knife past my opponent’s face, grazing his ear and knocking away his sunglasses, before clattering against the wall, and falling to the floor.

“You did good, kid. Your technique is a little sloppy, but we can work on that,” Greed says, his Ultimate Shield retracting. He extends his hand, and helps me up. I roll my eyes, but accept his help anyway, and go to retrieve my knife.


	3. Meeting Anjou

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanner meets a new friend, and asks Greed an important question.

I collapse onto the loveseat with a sigh. Who knew sparring would be so exhausting. The Boss announces that he’ll be in the kitchen, and makes for the stairs.

Just as Greed’s about to leave, however, he says, “If Anjou gets here before I’m done, just tell her I’m making lunch.”

Everyone seems to nod in understanding.

“Who’s Anjou?” I ask.

“Oh, she’s another member of our gang. She’s cool. She’s usually out doing her own thing, but we don’t really blame her. Besides, the Boss thinks she’s pretty,” Dolcetto explains, the corner of his mouth turning upwards in an almost teasing smile towards the end.

Martel butts in, “Well, she _is_. She also handed his ass to him the last time they sparred together, but that’s just a bonus, in my opinion.”

I turn over in my spot so I’m hanging off the loveseat face up, with one leg dangling over the armrest. “Sounds pretty gay to me.”

“Speak for yourself Tanner, the way you sit just gives you away,” She teases.

I grin. “You got me, Martel. I’m gay as fuck.”

This elicits a laugh from the others, and a knowing look from Martel. 

A few minutes pass in relative silence, before Greed returns, with two trays of food, one of which is balanced on his head. He steps inside, and holds the door open for a tall, dark-skinned woman wearing a green dress shirt, a white hoodie, blue jeans, sunglasses, and black loafers. That must be Anjou.

She smiles at him. “Thank you, Mister Greed.” she removes her hoodie, revealing shoulder-length, shock-white hair, with fluffy, catlike ears poking out, and a long tail. When she removes her sunglasses, I get a clear view of deep red eyes. _A chimera. An Ishvalan chimera… don’t Ishvalans’ religious beliefs denounce alchemy?_ I want to say something, to ask what happened to her, but I keep my mouth shut. We don’t even know each other.

When Greed turns to face us, he nearly drops the food laughing. “Pfft! Tanner! What— why are you sitting like that!”

“I’m gay, Boss. I can’t sit straight,” I say, deadpan.

It’s at least a minute before he’s calm enough to speak again. In that time, I sit up with one leg spread out in front of me and the other folded up beside me. 

“Works for me,” Greed snickers. “Oh yeah, Anjou, meet Tanner.”

“Hello,” she says shyly.

“Hey,” I reply. “Nice to meet you.”

“You’re not gonna freak out?”

“No? Why would I? Whatever it is, it doesn’t matter to me. You’re still a person, yeah?”

This seems to calm her down. “Yeah, you’re right. I’ve just faced a lot of prejudice before I met Greed.”

“That must be tough,” I say. “So, how did you meet Greed?”

Anjou’s face lights up at the change of subject. “I was hitchhiking to South City when he started to hit on me, so I punched him.”

“That’s awesome,” I laugh.

“Yeah, it was. I hit him so hard he went _flying_! I must’ve knocked him back several meters at least. He offered me a job right then and there.”

“Wow, Boss. I didn’t know you were a masochist,” I tease.

“I just like strong women, okay?! Jeez!” the man takes the tray off of his head, and hands out bowls of different kinds of soups.

After we eat lunch, I cautiously approach Greed. “Is it really okay?”

“Is what okay?”

“Is it really okay that I’m gay?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?”

“Ermmm…” _How do I tell him about my aunt and uncle?_

“How many homophobes do I need to kill to prove to you that your sexuality doesn’t matter to me?” he asks.

I grin, and punch him in the shoulder. “That won’t be necessary, Boss. Thanks for the offer though.”

Greed smirks and ruffles my hair. “Sure thing, kid.”

I walk back to the loveseat and fall backwards, nearly banging my head on the wall. _I’m safe. I’m safe. I can’t believe it, I’m…_ tears threaten to spill down my face. 

Martel looks at me with a concerned look on her face. “Tanner are you okay, you’re crying.”

I nod. “I’m just happy.” And for once, I really am.


	4. Sparring Match: Dolcetto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tanner spars with Dolcetto. Injuries are had.

Immediately after lunch, Dolcetto approaches me. I finish chewing my food, and look at him, “Yeah?”

“Hey uh, you wanna spar with me? The boss said it might be a good idea,”

“Um, okay. Just give me five minutes,” I say, stretching my arms above my head.

Dolcetto smiles. “Awesome!”

I take some time to use the restroom, and rehydrate. Then, I’m ready. I unsheathe my knife, and face down my opponent.

As soon as I know he’s ready, I lunge at Dolcetto, but he intercepts my attack by hitting me in the stomach with the dull side of his sword.

I end up sprawled on the ground, the pain of the strike radiating through my body. But, I still manage to stand up. I lunge again, this time aiming for my opponent's legs. Dolcetto swings again, nearly hitting me, but I somehow manage to dodge the attack and elbow him in the shin, effectively knocking him over.

I'm about to help him up, when he suddenly kicks  _ me _ in the shin.

"OW!"

"Now we're even, jackass," he says as he pushes himself to his feet.

I smile, and go in to jab him in the stomach with the pommel of my knife. Predictably, Dolcetto hits me in the stomach. This time however, I still manage to jab him in the shoulder. He drops his sword in shock and in pain, and as he's clutching his shoulder, I twist his good arm behind his back and pin him to the floor, with my knee pressed into his back.

"Alright, alright! You won this round," he says breathlessly. I help him to his feet. "Damn, I think you might've actually broken something."

"Shit! Sorry! I didn't mean–"

"Nah, it's okay. This kind of thing happens sometimes."

"I just… I just didn't want to do any permanent damage. You seemed so proud of your skills," I explain. I rub the back of my neck, wincing a bit at the aches that are still making it painful to move. 

The two of us hobble over to the loveseat, and I dangle one of my legs over the armrest. “Ugh, I’m definitely going to feel this when I wake up tomorrow.”

“The boss has some aspirin pills, if you need ‘em, all you gotta do is ask.”

“Yeah.” I shiver as waves of pain course through my body. “I’m gonna need it.”

**Author's Note:**

> How were Tanners parents both State Alchemists? I Don't Know! Still figuring that one out myself.


End file.
